Eating less ≠ eating better

Today I haven’t eaten much.  Well. comparatively not as much.  I’ve been holed up in my room working on job applications, making some progress but also getting sidetracked.  This morning I had to take one of our cats to the vet for his rabies shot, and I scheduled it at an awkward time…11:15am.  I had enough time to make breakfast before I left, obviously, but I didn’t feel like making anything.  I was somewhat hungry but nothing sounded good to me.  There are some mornings I wake up and have “morning sickness,” which means simply that – I feel icky.  Some mornings I wake up and know exactly what I want to eat, but others, like today, make me just sit there and not do anything.  I did have a Frappuccino to try to wake myself up, though.

Quelle surprise, non?  I shouldn’t buy these anymore…how many times have I said that already??  They’re only 2 Points though!  After I got back from the vet, I was feeling pretty darned hungry.  It was getting close to noon so I didn’t want to make a big breakfast, so I grabbed yet another non-nutritious item, a Hostess 100-calorie pack of coffee cakes (1 Point!) and washed it down with chai concentrate and skim milk for about 3 more Points.  This wasn’t the best choice; I would’ve rather grabbed a banana or cantaloupe, but alas, we had none.

I’m definitely headed to the grocery store tomorrow to stock up on healthier grab-n-go stuff.  I worked on the computer, job searching and blog reading, for almost 2 ½ hours before I broke for lunch.  I let my hunger get too far…I was shaky and weak-feeling, and my stomach was churning.  All I could think of was a comforting food, so I made a Morningstar “chicken” sandwich.  I put my usual pepper jack cheese and yogurt ranch on top along with some pickle slices and slapped the whole thing between two Arnold sandwich thins (gosh I love these!) for a 6 Point sandwich.  Obviously I was famished, because I almost inhaled half the darn thing before I remembered to take a picture!

And yes, my friends…that is a Skinny Cow Cookies ‘n’ Cream ice cream sandwich.  And it is 3 Points of heaven.  Later when mom got home from work, she brought me some trail mix that I snarfed down at about 4:30…so no picture was taken.  I was so hungry!  And I didn’t eat again until 8:30.  I didn’t have a “formal” dinner, but I ate some more hummus & Stacy’s:

 

I won’t be buying these again…they’re too addicting and I don’t need to waste my Points on them.  I haven’t even calculated how many are in a serving, so I’m being a bad Weight Watcher.  Speaking of bad, tonight I partook in some fried veggies.  Mom was making some for dad and I had a few of everything.  We had a little breading snafu, though, and they didn’t turn out like they should’ve.  There wasn’t much breading stuck to each piece, so I’m not sure if that makes them better or worse, calorie-wise.  I had a few slices of fried banana pepper, some onion rings, and 4 potato slices.  All dipped in my yogurt-based ranch. 

I’ve always felt like such a fatty when (ha, when have I not??) people say stuff like “oh I can’t eat that, it wreaks havoc on my stomach.”  I’ve always been able to eat anything and everything and not be affected.  However, in the past few months, especially since I’ve been eating healthier, anything fried makes my stomach tie itself in knots.  I’m in such pain right now that all I want to do is pop some pills and go to sleep.  I think my body is finally standing up for itself.  All these years I’ve put it through utter hell and beat it down…it’s finally feeling strong and confident enough to say, sorry, “fuck no, don’t eat that shit!”  I think I’ll pay attention and pass on the fried stuff next time.

I topped off my oil-soaked “dinner” with some Ben and Jerry’s fro-yo.  I’d had a few spoonfuls by the time I remembered to take a picture.  I am getting better at remembering…really, I am!

So yeah, that whole “pop some pills and go to bed” thing is really enticing.  Don’t worry, it’s just Advil PM, and I need both the Benadryl and the Advil tonight.  I’m allergic to dad’s smoke, and I’m in such pain from my run on Saturday that I am literally hobbling everywhere.  Going downstairs is murder on my inner shins/calves.  I’m scheduled to start my C25K Week 6 tomorrow (yay, intervals!) so I’ll try stretching some more before bed and when I get up in the morning.

One of Mom’s co-workers told her today about a running store in Columbia called Strictly Running where they’ll analyze your gait and tell you what you’re doing wrong.  I’m planning on going Wednesday afternoon to hear what they’ve got to say.  I use basic orthotic insoles in my shoes from Foot Solutions, but I’ve worn them for a few years and obviously run differently than I’ve always walked.  I really hope the people at Strictly Running can tell me what I’m doing wrong or offer a solution in the way of insoles or shoes.  I can’t keep this pace up if my legs don’t get any better.