So I received my first anonymous comment. My first instinct was to get angry and ignore it. Then I wanted to respond to it. Instead, I’m taking the most difficult option – embracing that comment as true and getting some help with it.
Here’s the comment:
Love the blog! We have a lot of eating issues in common. Have you ever thought of saving desserts for "special" times? It seems like you have them at least twice a day! I too love cake balls, but honey, get them out of your house and stop making them before they ruin all your progress! I used to love to make them for everyone, but just had to accept that I'm not safe around them! Stick to your non edible projects and your waistline will thank you!”
Now, there’s no right way to tell someone, “hey fatass, put down the sweets.” And now that I’m reading it again, the comment is not as snarky as I originally thought. But initially it hurt my feelings because I know it’s true and I hate being called out when I’m wrong. But this blog was created for accountability – if people detect bullshit from me or something I’ve done, they can call me on it, and I should be able to take it.
My mother has always been skinny. My friends are all skinny. Seeing them eat, and now reading skinny peoples’ blogs and seeing them eat, I’m not sure what “normal” eating is. “Normal” for them isn’t “normal” for me. I’ve been in support groups for it, I’ve been in therapy for it. I don’t know how to eat normally.
I know that for someone trying to lose weight, I
probably eat too many sweets. Those bloggers who have already gotten to their goal weights are allowed to indulge – see, “allowed” isn’t even healthy terminology…I don’t want to say I “can’t” have something. I want to find a balance between too much and never.
So what I really want is some help from you guys.
When do you eat desserts/ice cream/baked goods? When you eat it, what do you eat? i.e., do you have dessert with lunch and dinner? Do you “make up for it” in some way? (I don’t mean purging, I mean having dessert one day then skipping the next, or working out a little longer) For people who have lost huge amounts of weight, or even small amounts, did you ban yourself from certain things or from sweets altogether while losing? Did you add those things back when you reached your goal? For those losing weight now, what’s your philosophy?
Please, if you can weigh in on this, do…I’d really like some input from others as to how to eat “normally.” And I’m not looking for any comments about the original comment…I want help for MY habits (and others who might be reading, too!)